Mother's Day - with a twist

I'd like to do something a little different on Mother's Day this year. I want to take some time to focus on the little people who gave me the much revered and respected title of "Mother."

So today, this post is for them. This is my list of why I love being mother to each of them. 

For Emma, my girl, my first born, the one who radically changed my life in the most amazing way...here are some of the reasons I love being your mother:

1)  your heart

2)  your singing

3)  your love for others

4)  when you ride on the lawn mower with me

5)  your love and compassion for animals

6)  the way you twirl - in any new dress, when you put on a 'cape' 

7)  how you always know just when I need a hug

8)  how you snuggle

9)  your perseverance

10) how you always look for the good in others

11) your forgiving nature

12) the way you hold me accountable

13) your tenderness with sick or elderly people - it takes a very special person to have this 

14) the time you skipped cheerleading practice (which you LOVED) to stay home with me because I was not feeling well

15) your imagination

16) watching you play anything and everything

17) your genuine laugh

18) your desire to do the right thing - at all cost

19) when we just sit or lay and talk - about whatever is on our minds

For Elijah, my 'baby' and my son, the one who constantly challenges (in a good way) my patience...here are some of the reasons I love being your mother:

1)  your smile

2)  your heart

3)  your sense of humor - this has been a saving grace many days in our home!

4)  your appetite

5)  the way you constantly encourage others

6)  how you're such a good friend

7)  how you always find things for me - you're my 'finder' - and you find things I didn't even know were lost!

8)  when you call me 'Momma Jo' - and the fact that I have NO idea where that came from, but it's your special name for me.

9)  how you can always make me laugh

10) how you always look for the good in others

11) your forgiving nature

12) your passion for the things you love

13) the way you notice every new and little thing about me - whether it's new earrings, freshly painted toenails/fingernails - you're a noticer, and that's a fantastic thing!

14) watching you play anything and everything

15) your imagination

16) how you know every single character on Skylanders and what element they are and what they say when you put them on the portal (see #12)

17) your laid back style

18) your charisma

19) our late night 'pillow-talks' where I get to hear all about your day

Some of the items are on both lists, but those are the things I'm super grateful for in both of my kids. 

Some days, I'm not gonna lie, I really have to hunt for something to like about my kids...because, like all kids, they test me, they push me, they challenge me and my authority. 

But if I'm truly honest with myself, my kids bring much joy to my life and have made me a better person. 

I think that's the thing about motherhood - it's truly a calling. And it can change you in amazing ways, but only if you let it. 

The Hands Free Revolution

I'm embarking on a new journey. This will be a life-long journey, but the rewards will be felt instantly. After all, that's what our society is about, right? Instant gratification. Instant results. 

We want it now; no, in fact, we want it yesterday.

Recently, two things have come across my radar. First, this video appeared, ironically, in my FaceBook news feed. Go watch it. No really, I'll wait...go watch it and come back a changed person.

Secondly, Rachel Macy Stafford's post, "The Day I Stopped Saying 'Hurry Up'" has had an impact on me. You see, I have a sweet boy who is a 'stop and smell the roses' kinda guy. My daughter, while she enjoys the smelling of the roses, she more wants to please me, therefore, she has stepped right in line with my expectations of 'get-it-done-now-so-we-can-hurry-up-and-move-onto-the-next-thing' mentality. 

Let me share something with you, friends. I'm tired. I mean, I'm really tired. Tired of trying to be involved in everything and tired of trying to be everything to everyone else, while my kids get less than the best from me. 

Before you get all high and mighty on me, let me share with you that my kids come first in my decision making. Which is where the lines get blurred. Because is it best for them that they be involved in every activity that comes their way? Or is it best for them to have a mom that is able to sit and appreciate them because we aren't running out the door to the next play/practice/rehearsal/activity/event/program there is?

I know what the Bible tells me. I know what God has been pressing into my heart. I know what my gut-wrenching, overbooked-calendar, stressed-out, tightly-wound, body is telling me. That we need to  s   l   o   w   d   o   w   n.

So, today, I'm taking the 'Hands Free Pledge' to be more present with my children. (I'm taking this from Rachel Macy Stafford's book "Hands Free Mama.") 

          The Hands Free Pledge 

     I'm becoming Hands Free.
     I want to make memories, not to-do lists.
     I want to feel the squeeze of my child's arms, not the pressure of overcommitment.
     I want to get lost in conversation with the people I love, not consumed by a sea of unimportant emails.
     I want to be overwhelmed by sunsets that give me hope, not by overloaded agendas that steal my joy.
     I want the noise of my life to be a mixture of laughter and gratitude, not the intrusive buzz of cell phones and text messages.
     I'm letting go of distraction, disconnection, and perfection to live a life that simply, so very simply, consists of what really matters.
     I'm becoming Hands Free. 


Won't you join me?

Share with me in the comments your thoughts on how we can make positive changes to put the phones down, close the screens, and really connect with people.

It's ALIVE!!!!

Ok, y'all need to get comfy...I'm about to tell you a most interesting story...got your coffee, water, tea, or soda ready? Are you snuggled in with a cozy blanket? Ok, here we go...

Tonight Elijah had baseball practice. Emma and I dropped him off at the ball field and went to Sam's Club. I'm watching my time, in order to get back to get him around 7:30. We get him picked up, and head home about 8:15. This is where it gets good.

For those of you who haven't been to my house, the master bathroom window overlooks the back of my yard and my neighbor's back yard. I walked in my bathroom and happened to look out. In the distance, I saw one of our chickens...the kicker is, it looked like it was on the OTHER side of the fence (in my neighbor's back yard). 

So, I stroll outside to investigate. Sure enough, the chicken was frantically pacing along the fence line, trying to determine how it got itself into this predicament and how to get itself out. I could see the worry in her face, as she could see her friends, but couldn't get to them. I can only imagine what was going through her little chicken brain.

I gather the kids and head over to the neighbor's to try to corral this chicken and return it to our coop. A few of my chickens will allow me to pick them up; this was not one of them. I know in my mind that this is not going to be an easy task. With each step I take, I'm rehearsing the kabillion ways this could go. 

The kids and I get to the same side of the fence as the chicken, and I'm trying to slowly approach her, in the hopes that she *might* allow me to just pick her up and toss her over the fence. She sees me coming and scurries in the opposite direction. 

I ask Emma to hold the gate open, thinking if I can slowly walk alongside her, with the fence on the other side of her, we might be able to just walk her right out of the yard. Naturally, she ends up in a corner, not at all interested in my plan. 

After this dance goes on for about 10 minutes, Emma finally yells to Elijah for him to hold the gate and she can help me. See, she and I have done this trick before when we're trying to get the chickens in their run. Elijah begins to hold the gate, but not before a 5 minute dissertation from Emma on how it should be done. 

A couple of times, the chicken gets within arms reach of me. I'm able to grasp out for her, but she's very elusive and escapes my advances. At this point, I'm beginning to feel a little Jerry McGuire-ish, in saying to her, "Help me help you. Listen up chicken, I know you want to be with your other little chicken friends, but you gotta work with me here."

Clearly, I did not have all my wits about me...trying to reason and rationalize with a chicken. Not one of my finer moments.

At this point, both kids end up at the gate to the yard and we're all very discouraged. I begin brainstorming other ideas to attempt to save this hen from it's fate of being separated from her sisters, when all of a sudden, the kids begin screaming, "HERE COME THEIR DOGS! MOMMA, THEIR DOGS ARE COMING!!" 

Having lost a few of my chickens to the neighbor's dogs in the past, we KNOW that they will attack the chicken in a heartbeat. 

At first the kids were able to distract the dogs by having them come to them. But as soon as one of the dogs catches a whiff of the chicken, he's gone! In an instant, the dog was at the chicken, grabbing it by its neck and dragging it through the yard. 

I immediately heard wailing from Emma and Elijah because they LOVE these chickens. I tried to stop the dog, but had no luck. Pretty soon, the chicken was laying in the yard in a heap. My adrenaline was slowly beginning to decline, and I was now faced with the task of calming the kids down and explaining to them that the chicken somehow made it to the other side of the fence, and that this result was a very real possibility. 

Emma and I began walking what felt like a trail of death back to the house; Elijah was already there. They were both in hysterics. 

I was taking the time to explain to them that this is what happens, and that our dogs are pretty much the exception to the rule that dogs like to play with and kill chickens. I was mid-sentence when Elijah shouts so loudly that I'm sure people in the next county could hear him, "IT'S ALIVE!!!! OH MOMMA, IT'S ALIVE!!! LOOK!!!"

I turn to look and as sure as I'm sitting here now, that chicken got up, shrugged her wings, and walked away from a pile of feathers that I just knew would be the final resting place of that poor girl. 

I quickly tell Emma to run to the house and ask the neighbors not to let the dogs out; that the chicken is alive and we're going to try to get it.

I make my way back over to the other side of the fence, and again, we are playing this little cat-and-mouse game in which the chicken gets just close enough for me to catch it...if I took a nose-dive...and then runs off. 

Have I mentioned HOW FAST chickens are when they are running?!?!? (Obviously not fast enough to outrun a boxer, though!)

By a stroke of sheer luck, I catch the chicken and, quite literally, toss the darn thing over the fence. 

At this point, I'm ready for a stiff drink! All of this excitement is more than I can handle!

I begin walking back to the yard, after a successful search-and-rescue mission, and Elijah says, "It's a miracle! I just knew that God would save that chicken!!"

Oh to have the faith of a child again...

Stay tuned for further antics from my chickens! (Even though the blog says 13 chickens, I actually have 8 chickens, and 11 pullets, which are like female teenage chickens...and they're not even as much trouble as the grown ones!!!) 

I'm gonna go fix that drink now...enjoy your evening/day/afternoon, whatever time it is when you're reading this. 

Do You Measure Yourself?

A journalist visited a town famous for its rampant unhappiness to see if he could understand its origin. Walking down the street, he noticed a man ahead of him. 

Suddenly, a little man, no more than a few inches high, appeared and ran up the man's leg. He started sticking pins into the man and sewing things to him. 

Instantly, the man was covered by these tiny tailors, all sticking him with pins. He looked completely miserable as he shuffled off.

The journalist saw this happen to one person after another, until he was ready to give up and go home. The town was completely infested with tiny tailors; no wonder everyone was unhappy.

Then the journalist noticed one woman covered with tiny tailors who apparently said something, and the tiny tailors just melted away. 

The journalist ran over to her. "What did you say to get free of them?!" he exclaimed.

"Oh," she answered, "it was nothing. I just told them I've decided to stop measuring myself."

--Guy Finley

How many of us allow tiny tailors to attach themselves to us? To our outsides...to our insides...

How many of us walk through life feeling defeated, because we feel like we don't measure up to some impossible standard of living?

Whether it's the way you feel you should be talking to your spouse, or the way you feel you should be interacting with your children, or the way you feel you should lose weight, or the way you feel you should treat yourself.

In all of these examples, we should ourselves. We should ourselves almost to the point of exhaustion and defeat.

Surely, I'm not the only one?!

This year was supposed to be the year I came to accept myself and who I am. Not that I was content to just remain stagnant where I was when the year started, but to just accept ME. for ME.

I'm not sure I'm progressing in this goal.

And it makes me kind of sad.

What example am I setting for my children if I walk around with LOADS of negative self-talk going on? That does nothing for the environment in my home.

Just this morning, I felt like I was failing at life. And then my daughter, my beautiful daughter, wrapped her arms around my neck and said the sweetest words to me, "I Love You, Momma."

WOAH! It was like a ton of bricks were lifted off my shoulders.

Then, my son echoed her sentiments. He said, "It's OK, Momma."

And I knew I was right where I was meant to be...being 'measured' by the ones who love me most. Who see me at my best...and at my worst...

We are our own worst critics. Let's band together and silence the inner voice which tells us that we'll never measure up...

Five Minute Friday - Friend

Hey Friends! Here we are, at another Friday (already?). So, I've been doing some thinking...scary, I know. I'm going to start writing more frequently. There for a while, I was writing almost daily and it has slowly trickled off. But, as I've said before...I need to write like I need to breathe. And sometimes, it's not much...but just taking the time to sit down and get all of the thoughts out of my head and onto paper (21st Century translation = computer screen).

Today, as with all Fridays, I'm linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for her Five Minute Friday writing challenge. Today's prompt is Friend...ready? GO!

It's funny to think of the word friend. Sometimes, I think that I haven't got a friend in the world, and then other times, when I take a long-hard look around, I realize I'm blessed with an overwhelming supply of friends.

Those who encourage me with the things they say or do.

Those who lift me up when I'm having trouble lifting myself up.

Those who pray for me when I feel I don't have the strength or stamina to pray for myself.

Those who remind me of the song of my life and sing it back to me when I forget it's chorus or the verses.

Those who let me know that it's okay (and perfectly normal) to yell at my children on occasion. (Side note: thank God for His grace and mercy that I don't stay in 'that place.')

Those who push me to do more. To be more. To love more. To forgive more - even when I feel I. Just. Can't. Forgive. Again.

Those who love me when I feel I'm at my most unlovable.

Those who have care and compassion for me when I'm hurting.

I have several girlfriends who fit some or all of the above. And I'm so grateful for each and every one of them.

I know that you, my dear reader, have this person or people in your life that do these things for you. Oftentimes, it's the person we would least expect it to be. In my case, it's my children.

I know that I can't share all of my personal woes and life struggles in detail with my children, but they have been my best friends lately.

They remind me that I'm their superhero. I'm their mom. I'm their first friend. And I hope to be their best and last friend they have.